automatic writing

some automatic writing exercise I wrote first semester I find kind of pleasant, thanks Breton, or was it Bataille? oh fuck it here it is:

Trying to find the letter “b” on my ipod Bauhaus Bauhaus where are you i can’t seem to find anything to listen to but the need for some truth put to music is overwhelming i need a goal i need something greater than myself musically in order to see what i want to and will probably never become i should probably focus on driving but the words keep spinning around in my head the images and emotions that need to be validated in a stranger’s voice or the frequency made by metal strings on a wooden guitar coils magnets fret boards plastic picks that taste like peppermint green and flexible that burn easily once housed in conglomorate music shops with distasteful and pretentious employees in gray shirts made of artificial fibers Mars Music sanctuary to the economically challenged musician place to show off place to be judged place to fantasize metal specks on the 60’s reissue les paul is there anything more beautiful than that cherry sunburst finish? Is there anything more beautiful than a stratocaster backwards created for jimi hendrix but never played by him declined in favor of the unconventional paisley that defined him defined those around him defined a generation of well intentioned elitists with fabulous music at their disposal so much music music with a purpose music with pleasure hedonism marked by a half opened shirt and a cockeyed stare curly blonde hair that trademarks a sound oh such a sound such an interpretation of an entirely diffrent culture and era Robert Johnson to england why? And how? Southern delta to overgrown abbey? Tom Jones and Huckleberry Finn would never have run through grass together makes one think of a more universal truth perhaps in a definition of humanity but then the thought that things just are, nature is the same no purpose no order no underlying justifiable cause –cause and effect: the subordinate of possibility infinite possibility for an infinite universe the overlapping areas, the venn diagram of “stuff” accounting for what we call probablility but no one has figured it out. We are flawed we are robbed and handicapped by these fragile five senses of ours these delicate breakable senses that in themselves have limitations dictated by so-called nescessity nescessity for life and the propagation of the species Neitche’s Neitzche’s spelling is terrible Nietzche’s ideas the Dionysian the Apollonian the seemingly contradictory dualism in the art the purposelessness of art the distance between nature and science nature and humanity the epitome of humanity in the purposelessness of art.